Monday after the storm

Today is still stormy and threatening but the weather has moved south and north of the Oklahoma State borders. Last night, while struggling with my programming code, I had a ‘time-out’ from my struggles. My rescue kitty, who lives in my converted patio room, asked to come in. She was terrified of the high winds, blowing rain and noisy lightshow going on just outside her part of the house. As I watched Masterpiece Theater on PBS, I held her and comforted her. At the height of the storm the local PBS channel had numerous interruptions in the digitally transmitted signal and even my comfort and reassurance could not calm kitty. She jumped off the couch and ran into my bedroom only to hide under the bed. No amount of coaxing could budge her. I returned to my program and only lost about 10 minutes of the program due to the storm. It continued to subside and the program concluded. I then switched to a local station to get an update on the intensity of the storms passing over the Oklahoma City metro area. The weatherman reported that they were dumping massive amounts of much needed rain and they were quite noisy but not terribly threatening and were moving out of the metro area. I returned to my computer, found the solution to my programming challenge and began to feel that I might be able to exit this course by the end of spring term which comes in about 3 weeks. This has been a very big challenge and I’ve only just begun to make any headway with data retrieval from the database through the programming. Each time I make a breakthrough it feels like the sun broke through the clouds. Appropriate, huh? Ignorance and suffering are merely clouds. Willingness is the key to pushing through the cloud banks that seem to surround me in a foreboding darkness. As I opened to compassion for my kitty’s suffering and fear, something else was opened within me to receive the gift of release from my own ignorance and fear – willingness. Willingness requires much more than it seems at first glance. Willingness requires trust and the chance of being totally vulnerable to outcomes. Willingness requires surrender of my tight grip on the control console and allows a steadier hand to take over. Willingness requires admitting that I DO NOT KNOW WHAT ANYTHING IS FOR. A real challenge for an ego! Willingness seems to exact a very dear price from my ego and yet, the rewards are so far reaching (they actually go on for eternity) that no amount of analysis gives my ego even a tiny glimmer of how rich and full those rewards are. My prayer for today: Thank you, God, for the gift of being open and vulnerable before you. Thank you for touching my heart with compassion and showing me how much you care for me even when I’m tightly bound in my chains of ignorance and fear. Thank you for your comfort and guidance. Amen
Originally posted on Blogger 4/27/09

Seeing the Christ Within

Yesterday, I had a spiritual aha. During the morning lesson at Sunday service, the minister asked us to ‘Do the Work’ on one simple belief or concept. It was: “I am a Child of the Universal Divine.” He asked us to ask the first question about that concept or belief. Can I know this is true? Can I absolutely know this is true? Upon receiving the challenge I went into a reverie of inner searching about that query. To my surprise, it took me back to my earliest teaching learned from my fundamentalist father. Yes, he told me, I was ultimately a Child of God and not just a human child. Wow! No matter how hard I tried to wrench this knowingness out of my heart, I could not. I believe this with all my heart, my soul, my being. According to ACIM, I may not (as an individual entity) be real, but the thing that created me IS REAL and can never die. And there is nothing beyond that because that is or contains all that is real. There simply was no shaking that precept. This was an enjoyable enough ‘aha’ but the next one was even more enjoyable. If I can absolutely know that I am a Child of God, can I dispute that other parts of me in different bodies are NOT God? No, I can’t. Even if I don’t like what those parts of me are showing me, they are still created by the same thing that created me. Instantly, I knew the truth about no separation because there is none. Whatever one knows, all know. Whatever truth is is shared by all. Whatever is not is not shared by any. All my judgments and condemnations really are about me. It was, needless to say, a mountaintop or peak experience. I am a Child of the Divine. I do know this to be true. I pray you know it to be true for you (and me) also. Peace, Child.
Originally posted on Blogger 4/27/09

Not just Another Monday

I have been working on a book for the Hindu Temple of Oklahoma City. In June of 2009 the Temple will have an installation of several more Deities and it has been my privilege to work on some of the literature for the momentous event coming. I am learning about how much of Hinduism is the foundation for Christianity’s believe system, dogma or theology. I am interested, fascinated and yet, a bit overwhelmed with the Hindu rituals and how they relate to their (and Christian) forms of worship. I have been invited to attend this grand event and am inclined to attend at least a part of the festivities in order to learn more about this fascinating subject on a firsthand basis. I will let you know how this unfolds.
Originally posted on Blogger 4/20/09